Upasana Kamineni Konidela, entrepreneur and philanthropist, has long been a voice for women’s empowerment in India. From advocating for financial independence to encouraging emotional autonomy, she has consistently pushed for a society where women live by choice, not compulsion. In her latest reflection, Upasana delves into the evolving idea of marriage, urging the next generation to redefine the institution — not merely survive it.
“Find Your Ram”: A Call for Conscious Partnership
In a recent social media post, Upasana highlighted the importance of marrying from a place of strength, love, and emotional maturity — rather than societal obligation. She encouraged women to “Find Your Ram,” referencing the ideal of a supportive and respectful partner, rather than succumbing to timelines or pressure.
“Marriage should be a conscious choice rooted in love, stability, and mutual respect — not a milestone to check off,” she asserted.
Breaking the Cycle of Sacrifice and Silence
Upasana’s message sheds light on deeper issues often brushed under the carpet — emotional abuse, toxicity, and the persistent expectation that women must adjust at all costs. She called out the flawed conditioning around marriage and spoke of the need to raise both girls and boys differently.
“Let’s teach our boys early to manage emotions, set boundaries, and respect differences,” she wrote, challenging traditional norms.
“Let’s stop forcing women into timelines — instead, give them the tools and freedom to thrive.”
A Blueprint for a Healthier India Begins at Home
Upasana believes that a stronger nation starts with healthier homes. She called upon educated, empowered women to become catalysts for change — using their awareness and privilege to reimagine family structures.
“We owe it to ourselves — and the generations after us — to use our privilege with purpose,” she noted.
Her statement underlines the importance of agency in marriage:
“No more marrying for money or status — those can be built together with the right partner, if needed.”
Tradition Meets Progress: The Vision for a New India
Upasana envisions an India where tradition and progress coexist — where marriage isn’t a sacrifice but a shared journey of growth and mutual respect.
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“Let this be the New India where people live by choice, not compulsion — where we’re proud of who we are, and even prouder of who we’re becoming, together.”
Insights from Harvard: Why Do Women Marry Today?
Sharing an anecdote from a recent class at Harvard with Prof. Debora Spar, Upasana explored the shifting motivations behind marriage in modern society.
“Why do women get married today? Is it for companionship? Children? Status?” she pondered.
“The truth is, women no longer need marriage to fulfill these needs. It’s about choosing a partner who respects you and sees you as an equal.”
A Message for Progressive Indian Women
Upasana’s reflections mirror the shifting ideologies of independent women in modern India. Her advocacy goes beyond personal opinion — it is a larger call to society to rethink the expectations we place on women and marriage.
Her message is clear: Empowerment is not just about career or independence — it’s also about choosing relationships that nurture, support, and respect.
